Wednesday, June 20, 2007

So in love am I


I am in love. Very much smitten by a very sweet boy. He came into my life Late last year and has had a hold on my heart ever since. I do not know what it is about him that makes him different than the first two special people who came to me but he is. Of course I am talking about my newest child!! My sweet little boy. I have told him many times that he is my favorite baby and it is true. I seem to have bonded with him so much earlier than my first two children. I do not love him more than them. I just think I have come to know him faster, or maybe I have mellowed out more.


With my first baby I was so young (by most standards am still am very young) just barely 21. He came and he screamed. It seems he did not stop screaming until he walked away from me. Thank goodness at 9 months. Then he was followed by a little girl, she is very much a girl. Always creating drama which is a fun change from trains and monster trucks. but I was still trying to BE everything to them both and still be everything to myself and my sweet husband. I loved being a mom and I love being his wife. But I was still not very comfortable with the idea that this was all up to me. I was the person meant to bring these precious and most times challenging spirits to full bloom. I was overwhelmed to say the least.


Then When I found out Number three was coming I was not sure how I felt, I was partially saddened by him not knowing if I could handle being a mother to three hard child.


Then came the hard part. I was so sick, and in bed for most of nine months. Hooked up to I.V. poles, throwing up blood, in and out of Doctors offices and hospitals, nurses in and out of my house taking blood,and pressures and all sorts of things. Such a labor of love. We did not find out the sex of the baby and so that is what we called him "the baby" I think for that reason and for being so miserable I did not think of him as real. With the other two I was buying clothes and binkies and swings, having baby showers and doing lots of things to make them real children before they were born. But he just stayed within me, tucked safely away where not even I thought much about him.


When he was born I met my sweet baby who came out so quietly again I hardly realized he was there. Then because we had been through it all before my dear husband and mother both left me to tend to my other children. So I spent the time in the hospital just holding my baby. He was mine. It did not matter how he got there just that he was and now he was mine. We really bonded that first night together. we became fast friends and I fell in love. He is the most amazing baby I have ever heard of. If Guinness gave a record for good babies he would be it. He is so sweet and I am not afraid of him at all like I was with my first babies. He brought peace from the heavens to my home and I will love him for that always!!


So to my favorite baby I love you sweet heart!!

3 comments:

chronicler said...

He's certainly a wonderful guy. But considering his parents, that's not hard to say. He favors his uncle m. Looks a lot like him when he was a baby. Maybe his sweetness came from being with him a bit.

The Pea said...

I know I think he looks just like that last picture we have of Michael too.

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