I have been in early labor now for four days. What does that mean you say, That means contractions every four minutes 24 hours a day for FOUR, count em FOUR days. I have been going in to get checked because I need to see where I am going and every time he says well... you are a little bit further. I could have screamed so many times.
Then I have a friend who is barely pregnant with her fourth baby say to me, I just don't know what that feels like.. with my babies I have one contraction and 3 or 4 hours later I have baby. Again I could have screamed. "BAD TIMING!!!"
Any way I promised myself that with this baby I would try to be as gracful as possible through out the whole thing, and that I would be patient at the end. Well, after the first 4 months of being on bed rest and home health, track marked arms from botched I.V.s, one ambulance ride from throwing up blood, and then a realy bad reaction to a new medication. I thought that the Lord would at least make the end more bearable!!! I am not sure why I felt this way, but I did. And I have been angry, grumpy, and I am sure a lot of other words the people I live with would not say to my face.
Until today. I can always count on my mom to remind me of my grace.
As I have said before I am not a princess, but for those of you out there who do not really understand what this means...
I am the type to cut up a dead bug to see what it looks like inside, not run away form it. I am facinated by all things relating to the human body, especialy when it comes to cutting them open to see how they work. I realy did watch as a Dr. cut out a little tumer in my gut, and I loved the whole process.
(Okay got off track)
I am a pea and grace is a word to describe my mother, her mother and all of her 8 sisters. I am not graceful. But I am trying so......
Here is to having a better attitude in the end (which I know will someday come, even though some days it doesn't feel that way) of what will mabye turn out to be
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