This past year has been a tough one, that is putting it rather lightly however I will spare most of the details. I have learned allot and I am thankful for most of what I have been through. We needed to leave Nevada, we were not doing very well while we were there. We spent time on our knees together Joe and I, we fasted and prayed and then we moved to Utah. Coming here was not easy, I was so scared to leave everything and everyone behind, but we did it. We came here and we started fresh. Now here we are barely a year later and we are starting over again. New house, new ward, new everything. I am not sure I am ready to do it again. I'm not sure I want to. I guess I am ready to know why we came here. I don't feel like I have accomplished anything but failure, does that count for anything?
Thursday, March 06, 2008
This new house we came to is adorable, it is, but it is old and has problems, the sink in the kitchen wobbles, the stove is so old I am afraid that it is going to blow up, I have no microwave (that sucks), my dryer just quit working so I am having o hang dry and then iron everything I own, and now today my van is making a scary sound!
Some days I need to be able to just scream, I want to go buy something to throw and break but then again I cannot go anywhere in my car.
I know I should focus on the good in my life. I am having a bad day and I need to send this out into the universe to be judged by the whole word.
I called my sister earlier today, partly to vent and then to laugh. And now I have come to a decision. The after life is not going to be as great as I think. The mansions are going to be little more than apartments, but after all that we have been through I am going to jump for joy just to have something that is mine for good. Maybe even with a shower that I don't have to scrub all the time.
I feel better. Seriously, now I am going to post this, even though I know I shouldn't But heck why not. Even if I come off as the biggest complainer on the planet It will be better having it go somewhere than to just fester inside of me.
Posted by The Pea at 2:23 PM