Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Decompressed

I have been truly wondering about my last post for a week. I have issues with the fairness of the world. And okay I get it "Life is not fair" but I sure hope that it will at least even out with time.

Last week started with a call from my husband. A good friend of ours who he happens to work with did not come into work. So come to find out his 5 year old daughter has leukemia.



Of course I had just not two days before been on the phone with another dear friend of mine whose son just started to talk,which should be a good thing, He happens to be a twin but his sister only lived three days. So my friend is having a hard time. Every milestone in his life will hold a small degree of pain for his mother and as much as she tries to make it better that pain will always be there. I can understand that even my wedding was a sad day for me remembering the people who were not there to hold me.



All of this compounded when my mother called and my sisters husband was in the hospital with what looked like(thank heaven is turned out not to be) Congestive Heart Failure. Three weeks before this he was in a car accident and the day before she was hit from behind and it looks like both of her babies have whip lash.



So all of this compounded with my car breaking down my little girl potty training, my husband pulling a 70 hour work week and me looking to leave town soon. I think I just sort of went into a tailspin I of want to know why!!!!

Thank goodness it is over, I spent allot of last week doing what Smee and my mother advised. I prayed allot. I screamed allot I even broke some things. But in the end I know that my heavenly father can only do so much. Adam and Eve bite into the fruit and all of his control was handed back to man. We are in charge of our own lives. He has the power to stop anything and every once in while I am sure that he does but, It is not his job to make me happy. That is all up to me.
I am only as happy as I allow myself to be and whether I have a mansion or rent to pay. I can have joy in my life if I look for it. Even in times when it is hard to find.
I am so grateful for the gospel I have no idea what I did in the pre existence to be born into what I was but I sure hope I live up to it here.

6 comments:

s'mee said...

It is difficult to watch as others go through so much, almost as if we are going through it as well. Just try to keep things light as possible. Listen to your friends and offer a positive heart when you can. Let them know you understand how strenuous life is for them right now. Do what you can, but let go of what is not your responsibility. Pray for them and your self ,that clarity can help find solutions and easier paths.

Sometimes the "solution" will not come in this life, however there are ways to accept and live with joy while in trials.

Hugs and prayers for all of you.

s'mee said...

oh and as of today you're being tagged for a meme

Adán said...

As you so elegantly put it: "Life is not fair". Frankly I think life is completely indifferent to us, but like you've also pointed out, there is someone who is not indifferent. I just try to remember that the Redeemer is personally concerned with each of us. Come what may, His assurances are true.

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